Fort Ilocandia Photos: February 2012

SETTING THE EXPECTATIONS

Fort Ilocandia - Advertising (Website 1)

Fort Ilocandia website

Fort Ilocandia - Advertising (Website 2)

Fort Ilocandia - Advertising (Sales Brochure 1)

Fort Ilocandia - Advertising (Sales Brochure 2)

OUR FIRST ROOM – NUMBER 337

Fort Ilocandia - Room 337 Front Door

Fort Ilocandia - Room 337 Bathroom Mirror

Fort Ilocandia - Room 337 Toilet Paper Dispenser

Fort Ilocandia - Room 337 Bathroom Door Mildew

Fort Ilocandia - Room 337 Bathroom Ceiling

Fort Ilocandia - Room 337 Aircon Vent

Fort Ilocandia - Room 337 Ceiling

Fort Ilocandia - Room 337 Draperies

Fort Ilocandia - Room 337 Television

THE POOL

Fort Ilocandia - Pool Area

Fort Ilocandia - Pool Area Bathroom

There are only two restaurants serving the whole resort – both are overpriced and lacking in any semblance of quality. The “coffee shop” is where all of the items for the main restaurant, room service, pool and cocktail bars are prepared. This menu consisted of was mostly inedible. The chef salad consisted of hard-boiled egg, slices of Spam and “quick-melt cheese” (a Velveeta-type non-dairy cheese product) on top of tired iceberg lettuce.

There are only two types of salad dressings served in the entire resort – oil and vinegar or thousand island. Apparently the chefs at this “5-star resort” have never heard of honey-mustard, balsamic vinaigrette, Roquefort, French, Italian, Caesar, or buttermilk ranch, to name a few standard issues.

The second restaurant is a Chinese restaurant, and serves a bland assortment of second-rate Chinese food. I ordered hot and sour soup and it smelled rather off. I also ordered a noodle dish which was equally distasteful.